Reviews

The wedding is over? Oddly, yes.
You have debriefed and put everything wedding related into a box for the shed? Yup.
Things are relatively settled and normal life has begun? Mm-hmm.

Vendors want you to fill out client evaluations about your experience?  Well, oka-ay, Sounds Unlimited.
Watch out, DJ Russ- you have no idea what's coming to you. You think it's been over a month and you haven't heard from Bride Soldano, so you sit back and let out that breath you've been holding since you  crossed your fingers and went into the Soldano/Larson wedding unprepared and only armed with a tux and minimal charm.  "She must have either forgotten or loved me," you think to yourself as you mix a poor track of "SexyBack" and "At Last."

Neither, my friend. I am sorry to break it to you, but I am no fool.  I would never waste this opportunity to formally declare how disappointed I was.  And the month that has passed has had quite the opposite affect on me- the memory has not faded, as you would assume. Instead, it has become GLARINGLY CLEAR that YOU were the ONE obvious stain on the day, and that was known as soon as the gal in the big white dress had to look up at you on your stage and yell "CUT IT", complete with hand motion, when you tried to play "Friends in Low Places" or whatever it's called (sorry Garth Fans, but I have never liked country in my life).  You couldn't be bothered to even look at, let alone bring, the request sheet the couple toiled over for you?  Nice. You thought it was a shocking mistake that they didn't want "Love Shack" when the Maid of Honor had to break this to you at the reception when you were about to play it (thank you, Jennifer!) since you didn't look at the "Do Not Play" list, either?  Awesome. SO GLAD technology worked in our favor and our electronic submissions of these requests made it into your hands.  Whether due to the company's neglect or yours, it does not matter.  You will hear about it, Russ.  And if you walk away remembering no other words from the evaluation, remember this one- "stressor."  It is as good as a scarlet "S" on your tux when YOU are the one to stress out the bride.  Big No No.  Don't they teach you that in DJ School?

Okay, so a total modification of this post was actually sent to the company- a little less ranting and raving and a bit more professional jargon that will hopefully catch the attention of the right person. If I save one bride from Russ, my work here is done. ;)  A word to the wise- if your DJ does not contact you until two days before the wedding- run.  If this is only due to your initiation and then you learn he has called the wrong person multiple times trying to get ahold of you- run away quickly. And if he makes any comments alluding to music you wouldn't have touch your wedding with a ten foot pole- get out and stock up your IPod, friend. It's worth it. 
On the other hand, everyone else got glowing reviews. 
(Ha- now that you've seen "scathing," imagine "glowing").  :)